Washington -

 

After pictures of what Trump claimed was proof of South African genocide against white farmers, were proven to actually be pictures of somewhere in the Congo, Trump became frustrated and had Stephen Miller perform a finger-puppet show that the President claimed is further proof of violence against whites. “They look like some pretty bad pirate-ey dudes. Look at those guys on the end, bad news, they’re clearly murderous racist punks.” Said a dead serious Trump. “That guy in the middle is even smiling, which is sick, just sick.” South Africa’s President, Cyril Ramaphosa, say quietly perplexed, eyes furtively darting around the room, most likely looking for the hidden cameras. Trump then yelled – “Hit the lights!” Then the South African delegation was forced to sit through black and white historical footage from World War 1 that Trump claimed was an attack on one of his golf courses by Harvard students.