Tel Aviv –

 

 “We’re taking no chances! Its as simple as that!” Said an agitated Israeli military commander. Countless volleys of American made missiles tracked and decimated the delicious chicken Shawarma that had been cast aside at a local mall, presumably by a shopper. “You say ‘shopper’ we say terrorist!” The IDF spokesperson ranted. Many nations have condemned the action calling it unnecessary and a complete over-reaction. Israel’s Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu vowed to track down all unaccounted Middle Eastern, pita-based sandwiches, saying -  “Wait until you see what we’ve got planned for Falafel Hut!”