The Hague -

 

“The situation in Ukraine is one thing, and the horror of Gaza is another.. but this massacre is an atrocity unparalleled in our time!” Claimed the French Minister of Sport. “In no way did our great nation deserve to be humiliated on the world stage in such a brutal manner... these are men, they were treated like pigs on the way to slaughter!” After a fairly uneventful first period, Canada firmly took control of the game and pretty much did what they wanted on the ice, leaving the French team visibly shaken. One Canadian player who asked not be named said – “We felt pretty bad for them, I kept slipping on the puddles of tears in the face off circle.” France is expected to cut a deal with Germany to try and win bronze.