Ford Government to build coal-fired ‘Beer Cannons’ in Ontario parks.
Queens Park -
The Premier addressed the Chamber earlier today – “Geeze, y’know, the whole drinkin’ beer in parks is working out so well, we think Ontarians have spoken, they want beer at all times everywhere! And we will give them exactly that. We’re letting 7-11’s and mom n’ pop corner stores sell beer and wine, we’re clearing the path for thousands more grocery stores to sell beer and wine at cheaper prices than the LCBO, so beer cannons are the next logical step! It just makes common sense! Plus these babies will fire King cans and regular size cans! We did look into solar powered beer cannons but they just don’t pack the punch we need to really get that beer out there, and geeze, we know Ontarians would be disappointed with faulty beer distribution.”